I've Gone All A-Twitter

People are often surprised by my personal lack of social media presence. After all, what kind of social media manager am I if I'm not baring all on Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram all day? My answer to that, I'm the kind of social media manager who reserves her time for sharing her client's content on social media. When that's all said and done, there's not a lot of time left for personal sharing.

I approach my personal social media much in the way I tell my clients to. Use the networks that make the most sense for you. If you'd like to read more about my social media philosophy for small businesses click here.

Up to now, I've put all my personal emphasis into my Instagram account. I'm a visual person who loves photography, so of course I love it. Photography is the art of telling stories through images and social media is about connecting and sharing. Who wouldn't love a gateway for sharing stories in such a compelling and visual way? And for my personal sharing and connecting, Instagram is my favorite.

So, why have I finally decided to join Twitter? Well, because Twitter has tremendous value in sharing news quickly and succinctly. I now have a need to share my news and I need to keep in the know about what's happening around me. Period. As I've already mentioned in my installment about Tools Of The Trade, I will use all the tools I need to get a job done.

I'm also in the process of doing exactly what I tell all my clients to do when first starting out. I am finding which networks are best for me. That means keeping an open mind and trying them all. The prospect of one more network, one more account, one more news feed, and one more message inbox to manage is daunting, but I'm excited to dive in and see what I can make of it. We never know until we try, and we shouldn't rule something out until we know.

The Way Of Working That Works For You

I learned a lot in college, as is the point of attending. While in school I learned I'm passionate about history and art, something I knew I had faint interest in when entering, but had no idea just how deep that fascination went. I learned how to develop film and print photos in the darkroom, and how to sculpt a vase with ceramic clay. My most important skills acquired from my years in the classroom: research, analyzing that research, and then writing about it.

It's those skills that transfer well into a marketing career. After all, marketing is researching a business and their demographic, analyzing that information, and putting together a plan with it. Since I'm a content marketer mostly, the writing about the information comes in handy too.

However, it was not college where I learned most about life. That I learned from motherhood. And from freelancing I'm learning the most about myself.

When you're teaching someone else how to navigate through life, you learn a heck of a lot about it. You find yourself teaching your son, "People who say 'I can't' never get anything done. Say you can!" "Never give up. Keep trying! If the first thing you try doesn't work, try again in a new way until you get there." "One step at a time!" As I'm saying this to him learning to pedal his bicycle or tie his shoe, I'm realizing I need to listen to these words as much as he does.

Freelancing, working from home, and being a single mom are a daily exercise in juggling my way through life. This juggling has taught me more about myself than I ever realized I didn't know. Who knew all these years I'd been living life the way I thought I should rather than in a way that works for me and my personality.

For instance, I hate being chained to a desk (hence quitting the office job to work for myself from home) and at the same time I thrive on having structured routine to my day. Because of this, I get up every morning and make breakfast, make coffee, get dressed, and drive my son to day care just as if I were off to an office where I'd punch a clock. Keeping set working hours, dressing for work, working from my desk instead of the couch, all keep a semblance of structure to the day, and yet I'm not being restricted.

When I do work from home I sit at my desk, but I don't work from home every day. Something else I've learned to accept and incorporate into my day is the fact I'm highly extroverted. Kinda odd an extrovert wouldn't love working in an office where they're surrounded by people right? Well, here I am, the example of an extrovert who likes to work for herself by herself.

The truth is, freelancing is much better for my extroverted-ness than office life was. I love meeting new people as much as being around familiar faces. Working from various coffee houses around town gives me those opportunities to meet new people, and being mobile allows me to meet my clients in friendlier more comfortable settings. All the while, the drama of office relationships aren't a bother and the pressure of meeting rooms and presentation materials are almost non existent.

The point I'm trying to get at, and I'll just come out and say, is the only thing we should be doing is finding the way of working that works for us. I had no idea when I graduated college I'd be better off freelancing than being on payroll. When I had my son I started getting ideas about working from home so I could have flexibility to spend more time with him. Now I've made it happen and I've realized this is the right working style for me.

If you're not already working in a way that's best for you, then I insist, meet yourself and accept yourself so you can be yourself. It's the only way to be.

Socializing v. Networking

I don't call myself a social butterfly for just any reason. I love to socialize and meet new people. I find you almost always learn something you didn't previously know when you meet someone new.

Oh, you didn't know there was a Bob's Bagel Mart on Orange? Oh yeah, we go there all the time. Fantastic little bagel shop has the best coffee!

Or,

If you over boil the rigatoni a bit and then layer it with ricotta cheese in a pan, cover it with mozzarella, and bake it for a while you have a tasty Italian dish similar to Lasagna, but a little bit different.

As much as I love to socialize, as much as I love to meet new people and make new connections, I'm as nervous as the next gal when walking into a networking event. Networking events are a whole different ballgame from meeting people in a social environment. These events are designed specifically to bring about people who do not currently know each other in order for them to meet one another. Therefore, you have an event coordinated specifically for a bunch of strangers with the sole purpose of meet, greet, talk! It all feels very forced.

So what is the difference between a room full of strangers at a networking meeting versus a bunch of strangers in a pool room? Why is it I have no issue striking up conversation with the people at the pool table next to me and yet my rare, but still very much real, social anxiety kicks in at the door of the local social media round table meeting?

My theory is that when one meets strangers at a social event, the socialization isn't necessarily expected. It happens naturally. It's what I call organic socialization. At a networking event, it's expected. And not only that, but we as the networkers want nothing more than to present ourselves in the best light. These are those first impression moments, and we want to stand out. I don't know about you, but I immediately become socially awkward when I'm trying really hard not to be socially awkward.

On top of that, while networking events and social events alike bring about people with common grounds, the former usually means the common ground is work. It's what we do for a living, and what we've been talking about all day already. Now we're in a room full of people who are trying to sell their same skills and trying their hardest to outshine everyone else in the room. We all want to leave that memorable impression on the bigwig we just shook hands with.

And what do you talk about after the first five minutes of "Nice to meet you. I'm so-and-so and I do such-and-such for company ABC..."? Occasionally you do meet a person with whom you hit it off, and the conversation typically moves off the topic of work because you've realized you and this person have more in common than paychecks. But when it doesn't, you simply exchange business cards after a slightly awkward silence and move on to the next person.

Now that I've said all that, I still find great value in attending these events. When leaving, I always find that I ended up having a lot of fun. It ordinarily takes me a little while to shake off that odd bout of social anxiety, but once I do, I'm just as sociable here as anywhere else.

The thing about networking is, you're not going to see tremendous career changing results from one event, two events, even a year worth of events possibly. It takes time to build connections. But when you do become someone's go-to person, all that time is worth it. Networking is something we have to work into our modus operandi. Sporadic attendance to opportunities to meet like minded people will mean every time you show up you're a new person in the room.

I'll admit I've been more on the sporadic side in my career so far. I can't attend a lot of them as the babysitter issue is always there for a working single mother. It's difficult sometimes to decide which ones are worth the dollars in child care and more time away from my son, but I think I've let this become an excuse. But no more! I'm making a commitment here for all to see.

I will:
1. Go to at least one networking event a month.
2. Change it up - I'm not going to stick to just advertising and marketing events. I'm going to attend a variety so as to meet more potential clients in addition to fellows in my industry.
3. Be patient and accept that it will take time to build connections and may cost me money to do so.